Venus De Mars: Trashed & Broken Hearted

17 March 2009 Carita Ellis-Espola

When I first heard the term, “men are from Mars and women from Venus” in regard to that famous book, even as a kid I thought it was genius. So many people thought (think), “Well that just says it all!” being content to understand why they don’t understand the opposite sex. Well it’s been a few years since that phrase was coined and we hope everyone’s nice and comfortable, because this past weekend judgeMENTAL met an artist who takes you much deeper down into the rabbit hole. We saw a show that proactively renewed our faith in the word ‘artist’ by having the art injected back into it. Venus De Mars is a transgender musician whose larger than life persona is dwarfed only by her amazing music. A crowd at St. Elmo’s Bar in Bisbee, Arizona was mesmerized by Venus’s tremendous solo performance.

Being the suave insiders we are, prior to Venus’s Sunday night performance, we met and partied with Venus and her wife Lynette (I know….do your own research) at the Moulin Rouge Burlesque and Absinthe party, hosted by the Ortiz-Blankenship’s of Bisbee. They are a newer family to the area and went out of their way to show the fairytale town of Bisbee that they too can party like rock stars when low and behold, Venus DeMars graced the room (as a guest), as did over a hundred of our closest friends.

Despite anyone’s feelings on the transgender community, anyone who has ever met Venus could only say that she is the most humble and kind of individuals. Venus puts ego tripping celebs to shame; from her quiet and gracious entrance, to her helping me pick up a bag of dirty cups and beer bottles. I had heard of Venus as a rock god, a DJ and an artist. Though I had heard a ton, I had never seen Venus perform live and was actually quite concerned that she was unprepared to perform without her band of fifteen years, “All the Pretty Horses”. During our conversation, Venus expressed worry; as though she would have little to offer an entire crowd on her own. I was duped. We were all duped. Her performance was so intense and the music was so beautifully performed, that I honestly couldn’t tell where a band would fit into the equation. Though she would never say it and may never have thought it; she simply doesn’t need one. Venus is a force; a barrage of stories and melodies, punk, underground and hardcore rock and roll. There were a few who came unprepared for Venus and her performance, but before the night was over, there were none left who were ready for the show to end.

We must tell you about the wife of the artist; sweet, sweet Lynette. It seems that the only thing more difficult to comprehend about the transgender community itself (the often abused, red haired stepchild of the gay community), are those who make it their business to understand the unusual circumstances of the one they love, against all odds, by whole heartedly supporting them. Lynette hosts a radio show for up and coming writers in Minnesota and is the fuel that helps to drive Venus DeMars as a commodity and a transgender child of the universe. Being able to sit and talk with Lynette was one of the most memorable highlights of the evening. If you do intend to do that research on how she is possible, in the world of such a complex and charismatic force (and I insist you do), I suggest getting a copy of their documentary entitled “Venus of Mars”. Their lives and story as a couple has been chronicled and explained with sincerity and love. Check out the DVD and Venus’s new album, “Trashed and Broken Hearted”. Not only will you be on the inside of some truly great music; you may also get a chance to wrap your mind around how Venus and Mars really can connect. At the very least, we can encourage you to get to a show and hope that some unsuspecting person might consider the lifestyles of other planets and finally recognize how genuinely cool it might be. We are sold.